Friday, April 20, 2012

Survival of the Fittest

If I were a believer in evolution, I would say that everything we've gained over the eons, all of our human advancements, were all to prepare us for something many people face on a regular basis in these modern times:  Walmart!

This is the warning all Walmart stores should have!
Ok, so maybe evolution hasn't prepared us all that well for the age of Walmart.  I think if it had, I wouldn't feel like I'd been beaten to within an inch of my life every time I go there.  The town we live in doesn't have great choices when it comes to shopping.  We have Albertson's, Smith's, and a very small mom-n-pop grocery store.  For everything else, we have Walmart or Kmart.  Since Walmart has the best selection and prices, I always end up shopping there, even though I detest it.  My husband refers to Walmart as "Satan's Store".  Hmmmm, he may be on to something there... 

Beware! The Walmart Smiley is a trick!
It would be nice if this is how it felt
to shop at Walmart...

         Yep! This is exactly how I
         feel after a trip to Walmart!
Unfortunately, everyone else in town is in the same "meager shopping choices" boat, so everyone else in town also shops at Walmart.  Funny, they're always there at the same time I am!  Everyone I ever knew, I run into at Walmart!  I try not to block the aisles while I visit with someone I only get to see while on a Walmart shopping trip, but it doesn't really matter, because everyone else in the store is already standing around and visiting with their long-lost friends.  If I'd wanted to block an aisle, I couldn't anyway...they're already taken. 

There are never enough items in stock; I often don't get to completely fill my list, and usually, it's something that the other stores in town don't carry.  When you do finish the run-n-grab it race, there are never enough registers open, so the wait in line usually takes longer than the shopping did.  To borrow a line from the folks at Raid that make the Roach Motels, "Walmart; you can check in, but you can't check out"! 

More and more, if it's an item that I use on a regular basis, I will order it from Amazon, and sometimes it even costs less.  I love that I can shop from my home and have it at my door within a couple of days.  I wish I could shop online for everything, and never have to step foot in another grocery store.  But until we "evolve" a little more and have that capability, I will fight my way through the dread Walmart, and be glad that, even though I come out with some bumps and bruises, I have managed to survive! 

Hear, Hear, for the survival of the fittest!


  1. I guess it was O.K. when J.C.Penny did it to clothes or Montgomery Wards did it, but not O.K. for Walmart. I don't agree with what walmart has to offer from other countries so don't buy it. Support the U.S.A., support Mom & Pop stores, buy USA, see how far that gets us with cars and clothes and everything and keep sending our oil over seas.

  2. This reminds me of the South Park episode, which if you haven't seen yet you need to watch. It's exactly what you are saying, where Wal Mart has it's own evil entity that feeds off of it's shoppers. Anyway, great humor in your article!